Children who experience abuse or neglect by their parents/carers are left with utter confusion. They doubt their self-worth and the trust that they should have in adults and situations is broken. They become scared; scared of life, and either withdraw from living, accepting that happiness will not come their way, or, they choose to live safely. Some survivors have the ability to carry on fighting for what they want, but again this usually comes with a price and that price is the amount of ‘energy’ the ‘fight’ takes out of you. In my experience as a fighter, it’s exhausting. You are constantly reminded by your memories, experiences and the unexpected – all of which could sabotage your fight.
The good news is – it can get better. With the right help and support, memories can be worked through and the experience can be understood. When we truly accept that it wasn’t our fault, healing can begin. Also, over time, most people and situations prove themselves to be trustworthy and good experiences begin to outweigh the bad – and you learn trust yourself and live again.
My constant ‘Doris’ told me a while ago ‘It’s all about self-belief’. And she’s right.
Written by ‘Survivor-Uncensored’