When I think of you and try to put pen to paper, thoughts can stop.
The association I have to you is one of being numb-not being able to think or feel;
26 year on, yet those feelings are still strong.
I was never able to stand up against you with the strength of my body, but surely now I can stand up against you with the strength of my mind? Yet I find that learnt habits are hard to break.
I sometimes still wake up in the night, remembering a day when you took part of my childhood away.
Beer and cigarettes lingered on your breath,
Your eyes would bulge when you made your noise.
Oil on the driveway from the cars you fixed,
Looks from the neighbours you tried to trick.
I can’t remember the colour of our front door-
but clearly remember laying on the floor thinking “please, no more”.
Written by ‘Survivor-Uncensored’